Friday, January 23, 2009

stepping it up

ok, so i have now decided that i am going to be a woman instead of just wife, mother and provider. as i hinted at in my last post, i have lost myself somewhere along the way. forgot how to "do" my hair, forgot how to be excited to get dressed up and go out.
why would i spend time shopping and getting dressed up just to go to walmart? i don't.

so step one: get friends.

step two: actually engage in friend like activities with these friends

or more exactly, actually accept invites to go out with friends. there was a time long ago when my husband and i just sort of stopped having friends. we were happy with eachother and didn't have much time or money to go out (both in school and working.) add a sick kid into the mix and there just wasn't time. most of friends at the time of our marriage didn't agree with us getting married at 18. and most of our families didn't think we'd last. so in an effort to completely dispel those thoughts, we spent every waking moment together. we enjoyed being together as a family and though we still do i think we have come to a point after 8 years of marriage that we realize it is important to have things other than eachother that make us happy.

it was rough going at first.

getting used to the idea of the other going out with others, having fun enjoying themselves was a bit hard. harder for husband than for me. some jealousy and insecurities and fears had to be discussed. some limits had to be set.

After a few times and a few months, we both now see that we are BETTER to eachother and our family if we have some things separate.

so, wen friends would ask me to go out instead of saying no, i would say maybe. but still limited time saw me saying no in the end more often than not. feelings of guilt that i am already out of the house 3-4 nights a week for work would take over and i would think well, i only have 3 nights off, i better spend that time at home.

i have now come to know that having 2 nights at home and one night out with friends is ok. sometimes (ok everytime) it is fun. and i am a better person.

now i come to the part where i talk about how these other women have the same busy life as me and yet they have time to look great. while i generally lounge about in my jeans and t-shirts- a.k.a. the uniform. no accessories, no fabulous hair.

let fridays now be known as FIX IT UP FRIDAY.

i will post my newest revelation each friday about my quest to be myself. to regain my self confidence. (this idea is totally stolen from other blogs such as big mama's where she had fashion friday which i live for)

so this week is hair. i have long hair, closer to my bottom than my neck. i am told it is the kind of hair people kill for, though in my opinion it is more hassle than anything else.

i do own a straightener and a curling iron. i even have a brush. but beyond washing and adding some conditioner i dont do much more.

here are some facts i do know:

1. my hair and a blowdryer NEVER and i mean NEVER mix well

2. i do get it highlighted to be blond (it is brownish reddish naturally)

3. i wash it every other day to keep it from getting dried out

4. i..... well that it.

i joked this week at work that i was REALLY DRESSED UP due to the fact i had a bobby pin in place to keep my longer bangs out of my face. the sad things folks is that i wasn't kidding.

so this weekend i am going out to dinner and then working on a basket for a work raffle (you will soon get the idea that my job often spills over into the rest of my life)

i am so excited because this is a new group of friends for me and i want to look good. so i have a plan to scour all magazines i have ( which is a lot since i am addicted to glamour, shape and cosmo to name a few)

and try and find some fabulous way to do my hair. any and all input is welcome and needed! and that will be fix it up friday, i ask a question set in place my plan and we can all share our tips with each other!

and keep your fingers crossed for me tomorrow when i prepare to WOW my friend with my hair knowledge!